Thursday, June 25, 2009

R.I.P. Michael Jackson...The King of Pop

What a day this has been...

Michael Jackson, a man whom I've been a fan of it seems all my life, passed away this afternoon. A true icon...it's difficult to find the words to describe what I'm feeling right now. Earlier today, when I read that he had been taken to the hospital due to a cardiac arrest. I was thinking that he would be okay; no way would this man be taken away from the world, not yet at least. Then, via Twitter, I started to see folks saying that he passed away. Still, I could not believe it! He had to make his comeback, give a middle finger to all the haters out there who said he didn't have what it takes anymore. While I wouldn't have been able to attend one of the concerts in London, I knew that there would be footage or some other way that I could experience THE CONCERT OF THE CENTURY!

So no matter what was said, I refused to believe that Michael was gone. I sat at work, tissue in hand, tears in my eyes trying not to break down as I read all the news websites and listened as radio stations made the claim that he was indeed gone. Feeling numb, I left work, listened to the radio so I wouldn't miss anything. Got home, watched the news and began to cry when they said the LA Times announced his death. Cried even more when CNN started playing a clip from a TV show when Michael was performing "I Want You Back" as one of The Jackson 5. Cried off and on, for awhile as I watched all the coverage and the music clips. Reminisced about my childhood, listening to my parents Off The Wall and Thriller albums (for real vinyl records on my record player, lol). Music that would have me laughing, singing my heart out one moment and crying like a baby because he was so vulnerable and I could feel what he was feeling. Mind you, I'm 7 or 8 at the time, but I knew what he was feeling and you couldn't tell me otherwise.

What were your fave MJ moments? I remember when a Michael Jackson video was an EVENT!!! And if you missed the world premiere of the video, you should have felt shame. I would be on the phone with friends, talking about how cool this "Black or White" and "Remember the Time" was. The first time I saw "Smooth Criminal" and the entire Moonwalker movie...Michael Jackson is apart of many memories in my life...I'm going to miss him so much...getting teary eyed again....

Really, what were your favorite Michael Jackson moments?

Thinking about this makes me feel something like what John Mayer was saying on Twitter...I feel like a piece of my childhood is gone. Not trying to be dramatic or anything, but this truly hurt my soul.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I wanna be loved....

Yeah
I said it
I wanna be loved
And another thing
I want to love back

See
I'm not a selfish woman
I have every intention
of loving a man
as strongly
as he loves
me

That is what Lauryn said, right?
Reciprocity
That is what I'm looking for
what I'm craving
and aching for

Closed mouths
don't get fed, so
no fear of
rejection here
anymore
Vocalization is
necessary

I said
I want to be loved
And
I want to love back

There is nothing
selfish about
a woman who
has every intention
of loving a man
as strongly
as he loves
she

Okay, you may be asking yourself: what brought this about? I enjoy writing; it is said that one can find catharsis in writing. I needed to purge. I've been feeling, lately, that I'm missing out on something major. Music does something to me; I love it so much. In me, it brings about realization. That said, I've been listening to this song by Jeff Bradshaw (feat. Glen Lewis) called Beyond the Stars. It is beautiful; the music and words do something to me. So I decided to really open up here and share something deeper about my self. That's not to say that what I post on this blog is meaningless. What ever I say on here means a lot to me, but I realize that most of what I post deals with my external concerns. I want to dig and deal with some internal things as well. This was my first attempt; hope you understand and possibly enjoyed. Below is the YouTube video for my inspiration: